Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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