he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
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