I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
