What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
