thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
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And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
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We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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