I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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