Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Everything about him screamed your future.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
