The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
i believe in u and ur pee
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
