She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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