They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
