Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
