Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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