I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
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They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
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I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.