I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
