why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize