I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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