I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
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