The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
