I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize