My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Randomize
