My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
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