I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
