I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
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