...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize