just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
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