every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize