no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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