i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Randomize
