O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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