i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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