The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Randomize