If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
