i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize