the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize