let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
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I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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