my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Randomize
