so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
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