oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
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