The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize