Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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