apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
