I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
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the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
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My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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