he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
