Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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