Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize