Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
