: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
