i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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