The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Randomize