she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize
