watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
