Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
